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Thursday, 15 December 2016

I Am My Worst Enemy

  I could have said it's a good day. The stats on my blog today are good. The marks at school in general are good. The food I ate today was good. The monthly pay I've just received is good. My family is good. My outfit and even my hair looked GOOD today. And many other things are good in my life right now but I am mad.
  It's so stupid how one negative thought can screw up your whole day and steal your sleep, peace and happiness. Right now there is ONE thing that happened to me that I simply think is not fair. It does not make much of a difference in my life though. Some others maybe would have even thought it's a good thing but I don't. Seriously, when you put a lot of effort into something and it doesn't end up the way you wanted it to be then even if it doesn't drive you away from you main goal it's still annoying and upsets you a lot.
  I know that the main lesson of this day is not to take anything too seriously and care less but I don't know how most of people do that. I still have to learn. What to do when something ( a failure, let's be honest) steals your peace so that you can't think of anything but this problem? I personally want to change things, solve the problem. But what if it is too late? You just have to let it go. The hardest thing ever. At least for me.
  I'm not sure if this post is any good for anyone to read but I am an emotional person and I need to talk through my situation to truly understand it. And right now I understand that at this instant moment I am being my worst enemy. I keep reminding myself of my failure instead of focusing on the good things I had today.
  I wish I could say: " I hope you'll never get in the situation like that. I hope you will be wiser and won't focus on your failures and won't try to fight the world's injustice because it's foolish." But I will never say that because I know we all get very upset with our failures and we all want life to be always fair even though we know it's not how the universe work. The important thing is not to make any decisions during this moment of ANGER. And right now I am thankful I didn't do any foolish decisions while being angry today.
  Life's okay, actually.
  It's been a good day after all.